


Toxicity

by double_negative



Category: Kuroko no Basuke | Kuroko's Basketball
Genre: (but my interpretation of Kiyoshi is slightly uncommon), (not that dark really), Abusive Relationships, Dark Character, Emotional Manipulation, M/M, Non-Graphic Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-12
Updated: 2017-10-12
Packaged: 2019-01-16 12:18:53
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,207
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12342588
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/double_negative/pseuds/double_negative
Summary: When the spider gets caught in the web he worked so hard to build.Alternate title: "Hanamiya bites off more than he can chew"





	Toxicity

**Author's Note:**

> To my wife, because without you kicking me I would never finish anything.  
> And because you like spiders.

When Hanamiya first catches a glimpse of something darker behind Kiyoshi's eyes, he feels like the whole world crumbles around him, the ground swept right from under his feet. He feels like his whole life has been some kind of a tired joke before that and everything he has ever wanted pales in comparison to how much he just wants to see those usually cheerful bright eyes clouded with something he can't quite place. Hatred? Disdain? Or maybe even desire if he's lucky enough. It looks so wrong on Kiyoshi's face, a perfect facade cracking before Hanamiya's own eyes and for the first time it feels like he broke something in Kiyoshi, something valuable and vital, something he couldn't find before no matter how much he tried.

It was so easy, but still Hanamiya is not sure what he's done to deserve such a marvellous treasure. It's a gift and a curse in one, because once Hanamiya sees the look on Kiyoshi's face when he casually strolls in his hospital room with a bouquet of flowers and his perfectly fake smile on and apologizes, the look Kiyoshi gives him at that exact moment, surrounded by gifts and cards from his teammates and family, that look shatters something inside Hanamiya too. And as Kiyoshi stares him down, silently, his lips drawn into a frown so slight you could miss it, so easily mistaken for stern indurance, but still terrifying on a face Hanamiya thought was incapable of looking anything but happy, Hanamiya feels like his entire being is turning upside down, he feels like he's being poisoned inside out, venom spreading through his veins, vicious coldness and creepling fear seeping deep down to his bones and he's never been that aroused in his whole life. He goes on with his speech, about being remorseful and apologetic and completely at fault, willing to help and all that stupid bullshit, but Kiyoshi just looks, his eyes lit up by something ominous, so deeply hidden before.

"Well, I tried", goes Hanamiya, trying to be nonchalant about it, as he shoves his bouquet into the nearest vase ungracefully, letting several petals flutter to the floor. It was supposed to be his moment, to gloat, to feel victorious seeing Kiyoshi broken down and miserable, seeing him lose all meaning in his life, but instead it's Hanamiya who feels vulnerable and torn open and aching.

He feels like he needs to get some leverage back, to grasp control of the situation, but when he leans over to place the vase back on Kiyoshi's bedside table, all he manages is a dry "Fuck. You.", before turning away to leave, completely disgusted by himself and done with whatever this whole day turned to.

It's only when Kiyoshi speaks to him, his voice a little bit hoarse and so much deeper than Hanamiya remembers, "Yeah. Fuck me", and in that stranger's voice there's no bite of an insult, there's no usual joke, and there's also nothing broken at all. The only thing Hanamiya can interpret this remark is a direct order. And it's an order he's willing to take Kiyoshi up on if that means he would see more of that darkness, if he gets to dissect that horrible monstrous expression gracing his favourite subject's face. An order he would not stop coming back to for months it takes Kiyoshi to recover.

 

When it finally happens, Hanamiya feels like crying. It's nothing like he imagined, nothing like he anticipated at all. Kiyoshi is gentle with him, like he's afraid to break Hanamiya, he touches him like he's some kind of delicate thing made of spun glass, and while he has reasons to, he's so much taller than Hanamiya, not to mention bigger. Everywhere. Makoto still feels like crying, every careful touch hurting more than any punch or an insult to his ego. It's unbearable how attentive and thoughtful Kiyoshi is, even when Hanamiya bites him, snarls at him that he can take it, that he will he's stronger than this, Kiyoshi just smiles at him, completely unfazed and everything on his face is that usual vision of kindness and concern. And while it's completely unacceptable, utterly demeaning, Hanamiya can't say he did not enjoy the sex. So they do it again. And again.

Makoto doesn't see the person from that hospital room in months.

He feels like he's going insane and people notice. He finds it hard to sleep at nights, his already pale complection turning sickly, he loses concentration and while his grades don't suffer, those who know where to look, notice. Of course, Imayoshi notices first, rambling with a knowing smile about hearts of stone that can weep too, rare mental illnesses that seem to afflict self-absorbed sadictic fools and mentioning something about owing money to one of his teammates. Imayoshi was always a prick, but this time Hanamiya gets the message behind his roundabout way of saying things and it's made even more infuriating by the fact that it is true and there's really no denying it.

Somehow, Hanamiya Makoto fell in love.

He doesn't recognize signs at first, because he's not a teenage girl who blushes and stammers, but mostly because he's never given it a lot of thought.  Hanamiya Makoto doesn't fall in love, he uses people, breaks them and throws them away. The only thing that Hanamiys has ever loved is the suffering he causes others, the pleasure to see someone completely torn to shreds, and at first he thinks it's the same with Kiyoshi. He worked on ruining Teppei for such a long time, of course he wants to see proof of his work, to see the real face that goody-two-shoes has been hiding so well from everyone who knows him, a twisted grimace of someone who's done with enduring pain and wants to cause it for once. But the longer Kiyoshi doesn't budge, the more little signs Hanamiya notices. His heart stutters every time Kiyoshi's name lights up on the screen of his phone. His pillow sometimes smells like Kiyoshi and those are the nights his dreams are peaceful and soft. Kiyoshi, really, is kind of beautiful, in an athlete way, and sometimes Hanamiya can't tear his eyes away, fascinated by the movement of his body... It's stupid, it's ridiculous, because who in their right mind thinks those things? Limerence always disgusted Hanamiya and now that he experiences it first-hand he wants to shoot himself in the head. He still doesn't give up.

Hanamiya tries every trick in a book. First, he goes for the most obvious thing, the love Kiyoshi has for his teammates and family. But when Hanamiya threatens them, Kiyoshi just smiles, once again, bright like the sun, obnoxious like a puppy dog and says that if Hanamiya lays even one finger on them, Teppei will make sure they never see each other again and Hanamiya doesn't really understand why even the notion of it makes his gut twist with unease. So Makoto sleeps around and "accidentally" sends pictures to Kioyshi, who just says that what Hanamiya does on his own time is not his concern, because they has never been a couple in the first place and Hanamiya is ashamed to admit he feels a twinge of pain at those words, "not-really-a-couple". He hurts Kiyoshi until his body is a mess of black and blue, but he just takes whatever pain Hanamiya dishes out with a wide grin, the type of "is that all you've got" expression which is just insufferable, and never, never hurts him back. Hanamiya ignores him, but he just shows up unannounced at his house drinking tea with Makoto's mother and it's Hanamiya who's absolutely fuming, hissing and clawing at Kiyoshi like an unruly cat, because nobody, nobody messes He even tries to rope his teammates into the abuse, but the only thing he gets out of it is Furuhashi's deadpan remarks about needing a new captain because the old one broke.

Sometimes Hanamiya thinks Kiyoshi might really be an angel, but he already saw that twisted dark expression and he's not willing to give up until he sees it again. Sometimes he thinks Kiyoshi might just be a complete masochist, but there was nothing submissive about Kiyoshi that day, nothing at all and those three words, the only ones Kiyoshi had said are stuck in Makoto's head like a poison dart, the toxicity rising each time they meet and each time Kiyoshi is once again not the person who made that order so long ago, not the one who made Hanamiya shatter and split apart at the seams, not the one who made his knees weak.

Maybe, Makoto is the masochistic one, so caught up on a promise that was never really made to him, so enthralled with a passing glimpse of a person who might never be the same ever again, enduring Kiyoshi's stupidity for just a chance of getting what he wants out of him, a chance that's getting slimmer by the day.

 

Hanamiya is getting restless for a reward he was never offered, the cracks spreading all over him and he's never was the most stable one, so when he's tired and bitter and bored of the games that won't work, he is finally ready to give up.

They're fucking and it's perfect, in a way that anyone would have wanted, anyone besides Hanamiya, because while it certainly feels good, he can never get the full satisfaction from revelling in the ruin he's made. Kiyoshi kisses him so sweetly, while he's deep inside Hanamiya and even if Makoto bites his lips, so angry and broken, Kiyoshi just licks over tiny bloody gashes and smiles. smiles, smiles. His movements are careful and calculated, something you would never expect of someone with his size, with the strength humming along the curves of his muscles.

"If you keep treating me like a princess, I might fall in love with you", and it's the first coherent thing Hanamiya really says to him the whole evening, and it comes out so cloyingly syrupy, the tone reserved for lying to concerned teachers and school reporters, a voice that he knows doesn't fool Kiyoshi at all, but Hanamiya is so exhausted of playing, it's this or pulling a knife on that infuriating smiling bastard.

And to his complete surprise there it is, some dangerous fire in Kiyoshi's eyes, burning out as soon as he blinks, leaving only hot coals, smoldering ash, a promise of harm about to come, captivating poisonous danger so close that it hurts, hurts so good.

"That won't work on me", Kiyoshi's voice is gravelly, it seeps with anger, so poorly contained Hanamiya isn't sure how he managed to do it before, how he could manage to hide it inside all this time, through everything Hanamiya has thrown at him. There's only anger, anger that betrays the true nature of a person before him, peels off the mask he was wearing to reveal the truth. He's never been a saint, no one can hold this deep menacing desire to destroy and still have a halo around their head.

And all that's left for Hanamiya is to feel equal parts delighted and terrified, just like he did the first time he witnessed Teppei transforming into someone threatening, dangerous.

"And that's all it took? All I had to do was lie to you?", it's insulting how easy the answer was, how stupid Hanamiya was all this time, how relieved he feels at this discovery. It's insulting, it's shameful, but Hanamiya feels like the fractures on his mind and soul are filling with the poison that has been destroying him from the inside is now mending him, like molten gold on a broken vase too precious to throw away.

"Or you could have just asked me, you know?", and Kiyoshi is not stupid after all, he never was dumb, he was vicious and cruel, because that question reveals that he saw it from the start, he knew it all this time, but he chose to hide it and pretend, and when Hanamiya laughs, hysterically, like his breath is being wrung out of him, Kiyoshi smiles along too, but it's not that enraging sweet puppy angel smile, it's something vaguely sinister.

"I'm not big on doing things the proper way", Hanamiya offers, still too proud to recognize his defeat out loud, somewhat unsure of what happens to them next.

"Yeah, I figured as much. That's why I love you", and it really doesn't change all that much, Kiyoshi is still shining so brightly, so insufferably, but it's not the warmth of a summer sun anymore, it's scorching, bleeding heat of a fire, ready to burn Hanamiya alive.

"Fucking asshole", the insult rolls over Makoto's tongue, so familiar in the combination of syllables, but filled with fondness for the first time. If Hanamiya was played for a fool, he can at least offer that as a prize for picking him apart, his ugly, disgusting limerence, himself on a plate, overwhelmed and poisoned by love, sickeningly sweet, topped with icing and sugar.

And when Kiyoshi's usually gentle grip turns bruising and Hanamiya feels teeth nipping at his neck, he truly is happy.

"But I love you too."

**Author's Note:**

> I am in love with Hanamiya.  
> I don't know how I never wrote anything about him.  
> He's my husband and my goal is to own every single piece of merchandise with his face on it and also one day write something that is worthy of his stunning beauty and shining personality.


End file.
